Stop Trying To Be Happy

Trying to be happy will ruin your life (not that that matters or anything). Let it go.


Try this for a second. It’s an experiment, relax, it’s not going to break your brain. Open your mind.

Repeat each sentence slowly, meaningfully, out loud:

I have no desire to be happy.
I have no desire to live a good life.
I have no desire to reach my potential.
I have no desire to enjoy my life.
I have no desire to be successful.
I have no desire to continue to exist.

How does that feel? Better?

Don’t just skim this. Don’t just READ it. Stop for a moment, on each sentence, and actually SOAK IT IN.

Don’t resist the feelings that come from internalizing these things; that would be a waste of time. If you aren’t feeling anything, and you don’t understand the point of this exercise, it means you’re resisting. You’re not internalizing these things because you’re afraid of what will happen to you if you do.

You may feel that letting go of the desire to be happy will make you “sad” or “depressed.” Just remember that thoughts are temporary, and you can always go back to your “normal” way of thinking in a few minutes, if you want to.

This is an experiment, for you to learn how your brain works. It’s a way for you to EXPERIENCE something that you don’t normally experience… to see how it feels to actually be FREE of your most basic desires, for once in your life.

Now. Once more, with feeling!

I have no desire to be happy
I have no desire to live a good life.
I have no desire to reach my potential.
I have no desire to enjoy my life.
I have no desire to be successful.
I have no desire to continue to exist.

OK. Good job. Aaand the inverse.

I would be OK with being unhappy.
I would be OK with living a crappy life.
I would be OK if I never fulfilled my potential.
I would be OK with a bland, boring, unenjoyable life.
I would be OK with being a loser.
I am OK with the fact that I will die.


Now… read these stories!

Apple Boy and the Orchard of the Gods

Once there was a boy, who was born in heaven, at the base of a great big apple tree.

This particular boy loved to eat freshly picked apples.  He picked and ate to his heart’s content all the days of his childhood.

The boy heard that there were better apples in faraway lands, and he became dissatisfied with his tree.

The boy left heaven and wandered the Earth, on a quest to find the perfect apple.  He made a solemn vow that one day, one way or another, he would pick and eat the best apples in the world.

The boy wandered far from Heaven, through the thick Forests of the Earth. There were many wild apple trees to eat from along the way, but the boy passed them by without much thought. He took no joy in eating these normal, common apples. The boy ate just what he needed to survive, to sustain him on his quest for the perfect apple.

One day, the boy stumbled into the secret orchard of the gods.  A sign warned, “TRESPASSERS WILL BE DOOMED TO HELL” but the boy ignored the sign and succumbed to temptation.  He picked the apples of the gods.

The trees in the orchard weren’t just any old apple trees; they were the most fruitful the boy had ever seen!  The apples were the best that he had ever seen in his life.

The boy began to grab apples out of the trees by the arm-full.  There were so many, he had to drop them to the ground as he picked them to keep his hands free for more picking.  He kept picking the apples and dropping them to the ground so that he could enjoy them later, once he had finished picking all the apples.

But the tree produced apples faster than the boy could pick them.  For days, the boy picked and picked in a manic frenzy, growing more and more excited as the mountain of apples grew at the base of the tree.  Every time he picked an apple, he spotted two more higher up in the branches.  He climbed and climbed, picking juicier and juicier apples, and dropping them into the pile.

The higher the boy climbed, the better the apples.  As he ascended higher and higher, the boy was continuously astounded by apples of a quality beyond even his ability to imagine.

After some time, the boy began to feel hungry.  He looked down at his mountain of apples, and yearned to eat them… but they were way down at the base of the tree, far, far below him.  He looked up and saw before his eyes the most beautiful apple he had ever seen!  He scrambled up a few more branches, and grabbed it, eyeing it hungrily.

Just as he was about to take a bite, the boy noticed another apple just a few branches above him.  It was even more perfect than the one he held.  In fact, this super apple made the apple he held appear positively rotten and unappetizing by comparison.  It glowed with the light of the gods.  This was the mother of all apples.

The boy decided that this apple would be the last one.  Once he had his final super apple, his quest would be complete.  He had found the best, most perfect apple in the world.  He would claim his prize, and then climb back down to his mountain of apples, to finally enjoy the fruits of his labor.

The boy tossed his unappetizing apple back down into the pile, scrambled up a few more branches, and grabbed his prize.  But just as he picked it, he saw an even MORE beautiful apple up higher in the tree.  This one seemed to be perfect beyond the boy’s wildest dreams… as if it were the one that he had been searching for, all of his life.

As he cast yet another apple down into the pile, the boy looked around and realized he was already in hell.

The tree was an illusion.  In truth, it was nothing but a ladder to hell.  The boy had climbed it of his own volition, lured by the ever increasing perfection of the apples.  As he climbed, all he did was put more distance between himself and his heavenly mountain of apples at the base of the tree.

Just as a mouse is lured into a trap by a piece of cheese, the boy simply could not resist the next fruit.

The boy was doomed to climb deeper and deeper into hell for all eternity, chasing apples that he would never be able to eat.

Apple Boy and the Realms of Heavenly Light

Once there was a boy, who was born in Heaven, at the base of a great big apple tree.

This particular boy loved to eat freshly picked apples.  He picked and ate to his heart’s content all the days of his childhood.

The boy heard that there were better apples in faraway lands, but he didn’t care. He enjoyed every bite of the apples that he picked.

He sat at the base of the tree all day, just loving life and eating apples.

For many years, the boy lived in Heaven, eating his delicious apples. He was happy, and he had no reason to get up from where he sat.

One year there was a drought. The boy was hungry. His tree had run out of apples.

The boy stood up and strolled about, wandering merrily in search of another apple tree.

The boy wandered for only a short while before stumbling upon another apple tree, close to the place where The Heaven meets The Earth. Even though this tree was on the Earth, it was close enough to Heaven that it was still bathed in Heavenly Light.

The boy sat down happily at the base of the tree and began eating its fruit. The apples were not of the highest quality, but the boy didn’t mind. He was happy to have his belly full, as he basked in the warmth of the heavenly light.

A farmer appeared before the boy, looking serious and stern.

“Get off my land,” the Farmer said shortly. “You are trespassing, and eating my apples.”

The boy felt sorry for eating the Farmer’s apples. He stood up and brushed himself off. The boy apologized, and promised the Farmer that he would find his own apple tree, and bring back some more apples to replace the ones that he had eaten.

The Farmer warned the boy, “Don’t get stuck on the idea of staying close to Heaven. There are no unclaimed trees in the realms of Heavenly Light. There are many available to you, but they are deeper in the Forest.”

Seeing the boy’s downcast face, the Farmer added kindly,

“Don’t let the cold darkness of the Forest get you down. Just find a place and settle down; the Heavenly Light will always be in your heart.”

The boy was unsure of the Farmer’s advice. Reluctantly, he began to walk deeper into the Forests of the Earth. Every step he took into the Forest was a step away from Heaven. The trees of the Forest stood between the boy and the Heavenly Light, casting long, dark shadows upon the ground.

The boy remembered the Heavenly Light, and was unhappy in the cold darkness of the forest.

The boy walked in the shadow of the Forest for only a short time before he discovered a grove of wild apple trees. Claiming one for himself, he sat at the base of a tree, and ate of its fruit. The fruit was of decent quality, and the boy was satisfied with having found a tree of his own.

But the boy was not happy, as he had always been before. He was cold, sitting in the shadow of the Forest. He yearned to be warm again, to be closer to Heaven, to bask in the warmth of the Heavenly Light.

So, against his better judgement, the boy got up from his place at the base of the tree. He was determined to find a place for himself on the border of Heaven and Earth… no matter what the Farmer said. The boy made a sack of vines and leaves, and filled it with as many apples as he could carry.

Every moment he spent in the cold of the Forest, away from the warmth of the Heavenly Light, felt like an eternity to the boy. Finally, when he had filled his sack with apples, the boy set off back toward the place where The Heaven meets The Earth.

After having returned some apples to the Farmer, the boy began to walk along the border of Heaven and Earth, looking for a wild apple tree to claim for himself.

The boy walked for many days, passing through countless farms and apple orchards. Everything in this area seemed to have been claimed already. The boy knew that he could find a wild, unclaimed apple tree in the Forest, but that would be his last resort.

The boy wandered along the border of Heaven and Earth for many days, basking in the Heavenly Light, looking for an unclaimed apple tree where he could settle down and enjoy his life. Soon enough, his sack was empty. The boy was hungry, and he had run out of apples. The Heavenly Light was comforting, but the boy was becoming more and more restless. He would not be happy until he found what he was looking for.

The boy often accepted kindly offered apples from the farmers he met, but he felt ashamed to do so. Once in a while he left the Heavenly Light, venturing into the forest to pick wild apples, but this felt wrong as well. The Heavenly Light gave meaning to his life; walking away from it was the last thing he wanted to do.

Years passed.

The boy had been walking along the border of Heaven and Earth for years on end. The Heavenly Light was no longer a comfort to him. It taunted him. There were no farms here, only fields of parched grass that did not bear trees. Hungry and weak, the boy laid on the ground to rest.

The Heavenly Light was hot on his skin, but it did not make him happy as it once did. In fact, it made him sick. The boy knew he could no longer enjoy its warmth.

The boy sat up and looked around. He was very surprised to find himself on the border of Hell. The heat on his skin was not coming from Heavenly Light after all, but from the Fires of Hell. The boy was dazed and confused. How long had he been walking along on the edge of Hell? How long ago had he left the realms of Heavenly Light? In his delirious state, the boy wasn’t sure if he could even tell the difference anymore.

The boy turned around, and began to walk back in the direction from whence he came. Maddeningly, the farther he walked, the hotter the flames became. The boy turned this way and that, desperately trying to find his way back to the realms of Heavenly Light, but whichever way the boy walked, he found himself walking deeper and deeper into the realms of Hellish Fire.

The boy began to run and run, but as the flames grew hotter and hotter, the boy became violently ill and could not run anymore. All he wanted was to get away from the scorching heat that mocked his desperate effort to find his way back to the Heaven he once knew.

The boy finally broke. He gave up on the realms of heaven and hell, abandoning his search with a great sigh of surrender.

The boy stood up, oblivious to the heat, and walked into the Forest. His walk was strong and sure, as a man who had accepted his fate. The forest was cold, but the boy didn’t care. He had given up on the warmth of Heaven. It wasn’t worth the effort anymore.

Quickly enough, the boy found a wild apple tree, and claimed it as his own. He settled at its base and began to eat its fruit, as he had done so many years before.

The boy was cold in the shadow of the forest, but he didn’t mind. The boy sat at the base of the tree and ate his apples in peace.

The boy was happy in the shadow of the Forest. The apples weren’t the best quality, but he delighted in them nonetheless.

The boy sat at the base of the tree for some time, happily eating his apples. The weariness of the journey fell off of his shoulders like dust, and he fell asleep with a smile.

The boy woke up at the base of his tree, but he no longer felt cold. He looked around, and was surprised to find himself back in the Heaven he had left so many years ago. The boy cried tears of joy, and leaned back against his apple tree.

The boy loved to eat freshly picked apples.  He picked and ate to his heart’s content all the days of his life.

This Is Too Much Wisdom For You

You should not be learning this until you’ve already fulfilled your evolutionary destiny! The desire to be happy is an evolutionary necessity. It is the very thing that drives us to take action, to get resources, to gain power, to have sex, and babies, and a “successful life.”

Unfortunately for you, I have leaked this knowledge before you were ready, and destroyed your desire to do anything at all! Muahahaha. But don’t worry, you’re not completely screwed.

Go make money, gain power, contribute to your society, be kind to those weaker than yourself, build a house, have babies, and raise them to be healthy adults. This is your evolutionary destiny.

Nay! This is NOT your evolutionary destiny. I tricked you again.

Your evolutionary destiny is simply to TRY to do these things. No matter how hard you try to avoid it, you WILL take the actions that you THINK will increase your powers of survival and reproduction. Whether these actions actually work is not really important in the end. But you still have the DUTY to TRY.

Even if you have no desire to be happy, successful, live a good life or fulfill your potential, you must still take the actions that will get you money, power, and grandchildren. This is not about your happiness; it’s about your duty, and your destiny. You must accept this, and go along with it. It has already been decided, by a process much greater and more powerful than yourself: the evolutionary process of Natural Selection.

Don’t let your wisdom get in the way of your actions.

Stop trying to be happy.

If You’d Like To Learn More About How To Be Happy

You have a major problem.

Click here to heal yourself by learning how to meditate. Meditation will clear your mind, and all desire (the desire for happiness, success, love, life, etc) will drift away. A desireless mind is a healthy mind. After you meditate, go get to work on fulfilling your evolutionary destiny.

OR, click here to indulge your self-destructive desire to be happy, by learning about how happiness works, and how you can create it in yourself whenever you want. This is the stuff of the Dark Side, and I’m reluctant to even put it on the internet. WARNING. Once you understand how to be happy at will, you may lose all interest in fulfilling your evolutionary destiny, gaining power and resources, and having children. You may decide to just sit around and be happy all the time, because you’re perfectly happy to do just that. DO NOT FOLLOW THIS IMPULSE, as you will be in conflict with your Destiny. It’s fine to know how to be happy with nothing, but you must still take the actions of a normal human being. You can never escape your Destiny. You have been warned.